31-365 Alberts Adventure playing darts

As January comes to a close, Albert reflects over the adventures his had this month and feels a sense of excitement as to what else is coming his way. However sadly since he gave blood yesterday, he has been advised to not do too many strenuous activities.

This ment that Albert could not go mountain biking up a mountain like he had previously wanted to do today. Instead he still wanted to get some fresh air, and play one of his favourite pass times, darts.

In his youth Albert was amongst other things, a pro darts player. He was renowned around the world and many a young darts player came to him to coach them in a manner like the karate kid. He used to tell his students to go out into the wild and hone their skills, because when they do this, it is just them and the dart and there are no distractions, they can feel the dart, they think like the dart, THEY ARE THE DART.

This is why Albert decided to go into the wild to let his boxes down and have a relaxing game of darts where the pressure just oozed away. Unfortunately the media caught wind of this miraculous return of the dart messiah to the holly board and his peaceful day was ruined.

30-365 Alberts Adventures giving blood

Today Albert did something amazing, he gave blood

Earlier in the week Albert had seen the give blood advert and decided that he wanted to give blood. So he gave them a ring to find out where his local donation was talking place and booked his slot so that he didn't have to wait around.

The big day came and his nerves were rising as he had never given blood before and he didn't know if it was going to hurt. His friends has told him of the giant needles they use to get the blood out, and it might kill him. But when he arrived the nurses reassured him that everything was alright and everything was going to fine, that is till they saw the colour of his blood.

Albert sat down and suck his arm out, do to his size the nurse struggled to find a pulse, but after a while she could just about feel it. As she stuck the needle in Albert gave off a little yelp and twitched. However the nurse gave off a louder scream when she saw Albert's blood coming out black.

Albert didn't realise that they only wanted normal blood and that his special blood was no use to them.

29-365 Alberts Adventures as a magician

Albert uses the magic of illusion to trick his friends.

Today Albert had been hosting a kids party for his nephew where he performed magic tricks to keep them amused. To begin with he started off with the old favourite of pulling a rabbit out of the hat, followed up by pulling coloured hankies out of his month.

Sadly these magic tricks did not keep them amused long and they preferred the clown who was making them blow up animals out of balloons. How was Albert going to compete with a balloon making clown?

As the party carried on at full force into the evening, Albert looked up at the sky looking for help and inspiration in how he was going to win the crowd back over. Then he saw the big full moon and came up with an idea. He set the stage up ready for the big finale "the man who juggled the moon".

The crowed were wowed and amazed at this magic and there were cheers from all. The kids could be heard telling their parents on the way home about the magic they had just witnessed. Albert turned with a big smile on his face pleased with the job he had done.

28-365 Alberts Adventures becoming a first aider

Today Albert became a first aider.

After his many accidents that have happened while pursuing the thrill of the adventure, Albert decided it was time to learn some first Aid so that he could fix himself or others if required.

So he went along to the course and learnt very quickly that first aid is not as easy as he first perceived. First off Albert expected to be able to fix everything with just a plaster, and then he discover that he has to be able to make a sling for people to use. This seemed very odd to Albert as his parts just popped in and out of his body and he could not see the use for a sling.

But Albert persisted and learnt how to give people CPR without them sucking him into their mouth due to his size. At the end of the day, Albert was awarded his first Aid badge and can save people's lives including his own.

He was also delighted to hear that his adventure yesterday is getting printed in the local paper!

27-365 Alberts Adventures Swimming with the Fishes

Today Albert got his feet wet.

After the disastrous shopping experience yesterday, Albert needed to get out the house. So he popped onto the train and went to the beach for his next adventure.

While on the train he was reading the Danbo Times and came across and advert for adventures under the sea. This got him thinking and as soon as the train arrived at the station, he was off to the local diving school to find a boat to get out there.

Once out on the ocean, he raced to the best diving spot around, and jumped straight in. But he discover that the water made his boxes all soggy, and he just floated. Albert was not going to come this far and not be able to go swimming. So he rubbed wax all over himself to make himself waterproof and then put several stones in his legs to help him sink.

This worked perfectly, he sank straight to the bottom on the sea, Albert was at one with the fish! But then he carried on sinking and ended up stuck in the sea weed at the bottom of the ocean due to the weight of the stones in his legs. Albert was trapped, how was he going to get out? Then the wax he rubbed on earlier came into play again. Due to its slippy nature, it helped Albert squeeze out of the weeds and remove the stones, so he could escape to the boat again. What an adventure!

26-365 Alberts Adventures shopping on the internet

The problems of buying online.

Recently Albert has been saving money for a new zoom lens for his camera. His not the brightest when it comes to using computers. But despite this, Albert was determined to get this lens off the internet so save money.

So after a while of surfing the web, he found the perfect one and bought it in a flash. When the parcel arrived today, to Albert's surprise, the box was a lot bigger than he had anticipated. It measured a massive 30 cm long and 20cm high.

Albert presumed the seller was just being careful and filling it with packaging so it did not get broken. But to Albert's joy when he opened the box there it was, the lens he wanted, however there was a slight snag. This lens was 100times bigger than Albert's camera and the picture on the internet that Albert had seen. Suddenly Albert realised that he had made a massive mistake, and that the picture size on the internet is not the actual size of the product. How will Albert sort this mess out now...

25-365 Alberts Adventures learning how to dance

Albert becomes a dancing queen.

Today Albert decided that he has always wanted to dance. But he couldn't decided what sort of dancing to go for. He felt he wasn't old enough to learn ball room dancing because he would not feel right in a suit and he would always worry about treading on his partners toes. And he couldn't imagine himself becoming club dancer because he hates face paint, and all those hot sweaty people around would ruin his card board boxes.

So Albert decided to learn how to break dance. His a very flexible character, so he knew that he would be able to full off the moves very easily. His only problem was his lack of rhythm, but Albert thought this would just come naturally. So he began some lessons and could pull of the moves like an expert. But linking the moves together and with the music became a major problem as his sense of rhythm never appeared. In the end Albert had to give up and put it down as a bed hobby choice.

24-365 Alberts Adventures becoming a Tank Commander

Today Albert became a tank commander

It has taken a number of years but Albert has finally been promoted to his regimental tank commander. Albert has been looking for this promotion for a number of years and has seen his fair share of combat in the great war of the mole and also in the defense of the hill top from sparrows.

But his worst experience was routine patrol of the pond. When out of nowhere he came under attack from a giant toad. This monster weighed about 1kg and was the size of his tank. Albert opened fire but the pellets just bounced off the toads rubbery skin.

While under fire, the toad jumped into the pond and sent a tidal wave straight Albert's way. It was so huge that it flipped the tank over leaving Albert stuck inside. Albert thought he was dun for, when Albert had an idea, if he could raise the turret, he might be able to crawl out from underneath. This worked perfectly, and Albert was able to go get help to flip his tank back round.

23-365 Alberts Adventure In The Great Kitchen Cup Race

The Great Kitchen Cup Race

Today Albert invited some friends round for one of the greatest underground race compertitions... the great kitchen cup race!

If people think Lemans is tough, they have seen nothing yet. Albert has been looking forwad to this race all year, tuning his volkswagen camper van to be as fast as possible.

Albert didnt get off to the greatest starts, but as the race progressed, he worked his way to pole position and on to win the mighty kitchen cup!

It was a proud day for him and he hopes to repeat it next year

22-365 Alberts Adventures fighting the hover

Day 22 and Albert took on more than he could handle.

After the family had left, Albert had a lot of tidying up to do. There were crisps trodden into the carpet, blackcurrant stains in the work top and makeup on the mirrors. Even though Albert is not that tidy himself, this was more than he felt comfortable with so put on his mini marigolds and got started.

While hovering the carpet, the hover stopper working. So Albert gave it a bit of a kick......still nothing. So he kicked it a bit harder and........still noting. So Albert gave it the biggest kick he could and.........the hover came to life and went straight for him. Within seconds Albert was stuck and was going nowhere.

The hover swung Albert around until he went too far and his plug came out the wall. Suddenly there was no suction left to hold Albert on and he was sent flying into a vase of flowers. Never again will Albert do the hovering again, it's just too dangerous.

21-365 Alberts Adventures playing football

Today Albert had a kick about in the garden with the family.

Unknown to Albert, the family decided to visit today. And with nothing prepared for this unexpected arrival, people became very restless and board.

So Albert suggested a game of football in the garden. Albert is a very skillful player with a first touch to die for.

When Albert was going for a lose ball, one of the family decided to dive in with a tackle. Luckily Albert managed to flick the ball on first, and jump over the reckless tackle before going on to score the winning goal

20-365 Alberts Adventures with his reflection

Today Albert went for a walk in the garden.

He had heard on the weather forecast that snow was expected again, and he couldn't wait!

When he went outside though, he was met with a different scene to what he expected. It was raining and there was no snow insight.

Albert walked around the garden before become entranced by his reflection in a puddle. Lets hope the snow comes soon.

19-365 Alberts Adventures with practical jokes

What lurks in the shadows?

Today Albert has been in a mischievous mood. Playing practical jokes on passersby to great affect with them running off screaming.

It all started this morning when he put bird seed in his friends breakfast bowl and claimed it was Muesli, which they believed and eat the whole bowl. Other practical jokes included super gluing a £2 coin to the floor at a bus stop so people would try picking it up.

By the evening Albert had taken to hiding in the shadows and jumping out to scare people walking by. Albert has had so much fun today, he might have to try it more often.

18-365 Alberts Adventures at the GYM

Today Albert decided to join the gym.

With the summer coming fast, Albert thought he better get working out so that he would look good for his sunny beach holiday.

When he got there he joined a few classes and couldn't believe how much its going to cost.

As he walked into the changing room, he had a chuckle to himself about a sign "You cannot put a price on perfection" Albert thought, why are you charging me to come here then?

17-365 Alberts Adventures running away from till rolls

Today Albert took his adventures back to the supermarket.

Unlike normal people, due to Albert's height handicap, small meaningless objects become massive obstacles to him. So when he went to his local supermarket for his weekly shop, he did not expect to have to run for his life away from out of control till rolls.

It all happened when Albert reached the checkout to pay for his shopping. The checkout assistant went to change his till roll, when he dropped them and sent them tumbling towards Albert at great speed. Albert ducked and dived to avoid them, but sadly could not avoid the inevitable and a rogue till roll took him out from behind.

Nursing a sour back, Albert paid for his shopping and left the store defeated.

16-365 Alberts Adventureswith with the recovery

The morning after the big birthday celebrations and Albert needs to a breakfast fit for the gods to make him feel better.

So he went rummaging in the fridge and to his horror, has no bacon, sausage, or black pudding. How is he supposed to recover without the full English fry.

Then he had an idea (even though he had a splitting head ache). What do the french eat to recover.....CROISSANTS!!

So he filled a big plate of them and spent the day feeling much better.

15-365 Alberts Adventureswith his Birthday

Day 15 and Albert is celebrating his birthday!

It's that glorious time of year again where Albert gets to celebrate getting older. Albert loves his birthdays, making the most of it by seeing all his family and going out in the evening. Tonight his off to subway city for a night not to forget :D

Amongst the pile of presents was a stylish green Ben Sherman top that fitting him amazingly. Albert was so delighted by it as he has never owned any clothes before, so he may not take it off. Other gifts included a box repair kit, parachute and other adventure equipment that you never know when Albert's going to need.

Lets hope he wakes up with a clear head tomorrow.

14-365 Alberts Adventures saving the snow

Today Albert's rebellious side came out. With the snow around, all he has heard is people moaning about the snow. So today Albert decided to do something about it.

Albert gathered a group of his friends and went on a protesting march to promote the love of snow. He is a proud speaker and will never shy away when things he care's dearly about are being put down.

Albert marched all day long. Which sadly produced the opposite effect to what he wished to achieve. The precious snow he was trying to save had now melted away, and this was due to Albert's constant marching. Hopefully he will be more successful on his next adventure.

13-365 Alberts Adventures free falling

After Albert's tiring climb to the top. He camped there for the day to try and gain his energy back. But due to the high altitude, he could not get his breath back.

Panic began to set in, as Albert could not think how he was going to get down. He considered sending off a flair to get a rescue team to get him. But the remembered his at the highest point in the world and they will not be able to save him.

His rational mind abandoned him and he decided to free dive to get down the mountain quickly. 1....2.......3..........HERE HE GOESSSSSSSssssss

While he was falling through the air, he could feel it getting thicker, rational thoughts began to flood back into his head......"How am I going to stop falling?" This was a major problem, how was he going to slow down.

As fate should have it, Albert free fall gradually became shallower until he was skidding down the side of the mountain till he reached the base. Wow that was a trip he didn't want to repeat. Then Albert remembered he had left his sack at the summit. Let's hope the next people up there can bring it down for him.

12-365 Alberts Adventures climbing Everest

Today Albert went hiking.

At his heart Albert is a avid walker. He loves to get in the fresh air and feel the earth beneath his feet.

So with this in-mind, Albert decided to take on Mount Everest. He knew it would be no easy challenge so packed a sack with supply's for his journey.

On the way, Albert conquered crevasse, avalanches and vertical ice walls. But Albert beat the odds and made it to the summat.

Now how is he going to get down from there............

11-365 Alberts Adventures with his PS3

Today Albert got to grips with the PS3.

Albert got the PS3 for Christmas, and it has taken him till now to finally set it up. But there is no time like the present to get some mad fifa action on the go.

At first he found it very difficult to play as he couldn't reach all the buttons. So he found some lolly-pop sticks and used them to extend his reach to great effect.

Although he could now reach the buttons, it didn't help very much as Alberts hand eye co-ordination in his old age is not very good and he could not win a single game.

Hopefully Albert will be able to get some fresh air in his next adventure

10-365 Alberts Adventures with Lemsip

After feeling so sorry for himself yesterday, Albert decided to venture out to get some medicine for him self.

When he got to the supermarket, he was confronted with all different shapes and sizes of medicine and he didn't know which one to choose.

Eventually he made his way to the lemsip shelf where he pulled the first box he came to. In a flash there was an avalanche of cold and flue pills tumbling towards him which knocked him off the shelf and onto the floor, 5ft below.

Albert learnt the hard way that you should never take boxes from the bottom of a pile, as it only leads to trouble

9-365 Alberts Adventures with the common cold

Day 9 of Albert's 365 adventure and due to his time in the cold weather, Albert was lucky enough to only be suffering from a cold.

But being a man, this cold is 100 times worse than any cold you have ever experienced in your life and Albert is feeling really sorry for himself and has decided to spend the day in bed to recover. Unfortunately for Albert, he does not have enough money for a proper bed and has to suffice with an empty box of matches.

Hopefully Albert is feeling better tomorrow and can go on another crazy adventure.

8-365 Alberts Adventures on his Night Walk

After a few laid-back days making snowmen and having family portrait's done, Albert wanted to go on a walk in the wilderness to see what adventures had in store for him.

While on his walk, he traveled through dense forests where he had to defend himself from wolf and bear attacks. After all this Albert became disorientated and could not find his way home.

Even with frostbite beginning to set in, Albert kept his cool and kept on going as he was not going to let the snow defeat him. Luckily for Albert, a search and rescue helicopter spotted him with their spot light and brought him back to civilization where he could recover.

While recovering Albert started planning his next trip out.

7-365 Alberts Adventures with the family portrait

Seven days into the new year, and Alberts family want their annual family portrait taken.

Its a very formal affair with all the ladies dressing to impress. Albert on the other hand takes a slightly different approach and wears his everyday clothes as he does not own any formal boxes to wear.

Now the portrait has been taken, Albert can get back to his adventures and cannot wait to see where he will end up tomorrow.

6-365 Alberts Adventures with the snow

After his exhausting day out yesterday, Albert decided to have a more laid back day.

So he donned a hat and scarf and went for a leisurely stroll through the park.

As the snow was so deep, Albert decided it was time to make a snow man. So he gave it his scarf and hat, then found some stones and a carrot for the finishing touches.

After another day in the snow, Albert returned home hoping it will last a few more days.

5-365 Alberts Adventures with his super snowboard

After his terrible day yesterday, Albert decided to leave hos bike at home. But with all the snow about, Albert couldn't just stay at home, he had to get out.

So he rummaged around in the loft till he found his extream snowboard that he used to win the world championships 10 years ago.

Once he got onto the slopes, it all came flooding back to him, and the adrenalin was racing through his cardboard veins as he weaved in and out of the trees.

After a fantastic day, Albert warmed up with a hot mug of chocolate and daydreamed about what he would get up to tomorrow.

4-365 Alberts Adventures accross the Sahara Desert

Sadly today's adventure did not end in such a good way with Alberts biking road trip.

While finding it difficult to drive across the Sahara, Albert came to an abrupt halt when his bike flipped and sent him tumbling down the sand dune. When he reached the bottom he was met with another terrible surprise.

The bike that has sumasulted off the top of the sand dune, was now heading right for him. Sadly Albert has not quick enough and the bike crashed into him.

Hopefully Albert will be able to put himself together ready for tomorrows adventure.

3-365 Alberts Adventures accross the Siberian Wasteland

Day 3 of Albert's 365 adventure and the thrill of adrenaline cruising through his cardboard vein's is starting to become addictive.

In his youth, Albert used to be an avid biker, So today he decided to get back on the old beast and take on the Siberian Wasteland.

After falling off a number of times, Albert conquered the beast and raced across the wasteland to his next adventure. Where will this road trip lead to?

2-365 Alberts Adventures at new years

After getting his head back on, Albert decided he needed to get some fresh air.

After watching the topgear special at Christmas, he decided to visit the rain forest for the day.

While there he successfully managed to navergate through the dense undergrowth and came out the other side in one peice.

While on the flight home Albert wondered what the next 363 days had in store for him...........

1-365 Alberts Adventures at new years

This is the amazing adventures of Albert and the strart of his 365 adventure.

On the eve of new year, Albert decided to throw a party. The party went off with a bang, and all his friends enjoyed them selfs. The next day Albert felt a little light headed and starry eyed.

But what will his adventures hold for him next......